Top 5 Worst Animated Films of 2016

Well, you’ve had the best so let’s have the worst! After a bit of a wait (till the end of January, eh hem, sorry), this is the list of what I consider the worst animated offerings of 2016. As I said before, this is a more opinionated post in nature to my more general work. I’ve been waiting to tear into this years animated trite so let’s get to it!

5. Trolls

DreamWorks have a reputation for either putting out witty and artistically rich animated experiences (see the first two Shrek movies, Prince of Egypt, The Road to El Dorado and more) but more often than not opting to make the most insane ravings ever put to drawing (see that movie where Jerry Seinfeld voices a bee) or weak pandering schlock with bright colours. Trolls borrows most from the latter.

While it’s definitely not the worst DreamWorks offering or even a particularly bad film (at least, compared to others on this list), it suffers from only trying to speak to children and not exactly doing a stellar job. The story is simple and predictable, the characters are fairly standard and not designed that creatively, the bright colours are nicely rendered I’ll admit and animation-wise, it’s definitely the best-looking film on this list. But the jokes range from standard to trying way too hard to be relevant, ensuring its datedness in the next few years. The all-star celebrity cast perform their roles fine but their casting feels more like a gimmick for name recognition than what they can bring to the role.

It's by no means terrible but definitely underwhelming and worst of all, dull and predictable. If you want to be entertained along with your child, go and see Storks instead.

4. Robinson Crusoe

I was debating between this and the Ratchet and Clank movie for the number 4 spot, as both are tedious and groan-inducing to sit through. Robinson Crusoe won out in the end, mainly because I felt it was more insulting to children’s intelligence, unlike Ratchet and Clank which just felt like a long video game cut scene from 2004. The film attempts to tell the story of Robinson Crusoe through the view of the animals that live on the island.

Despite its inspiration from the source material, Robinson Crusoe doesn’t even attempt to tie into the real story, which would be fine if the alternative was entertaining. It isn’t. The film has the remarkable talent of feeling like absolutely nothing is happening even when things are happening. There’s no passion or drive to tell a decent story or entertain, it simply feels like a cynical attempt to pander to kids while also having no respect for them.

Many companies like Disney, Pixar and the aforementioned DreamWorks have put together that if you give children the respect they deserve while also entertaining them, the staying power will last and people of all ages will keep coming back. Sadly, this film couldn’t be further. It’s boring, annoying and seems to have a negative perception of its own target audience.

3. Ice Age: Collision Course

While Ice Age: Collision Course may not be number one for worst animated movie this year, it definitely wins for being the number one most pointless film in general this year.

I’m no fan of the Ice Age series, even up to the first film. The characters I found to be either bland or annoying and the jokes all fell flat and didn’t leave any impact. However, I’m aware that I’m in a minority there concerning the first film, as most people seem to like it fine. However, even fans of the Ice Age movies were found scratching their head wondering why another film was being made. Aside from retracing the same weak jokes and paper-thin characters from the previous films, what more was there to do?

The answer: absolutely nothing. It does exactly what was previously stated in rehashing the same unfunny routines and annoying characters in an equally weak plot as an excuse to get more money by beating a dead horse with another dead horse. If I even cared about these movies, I’d be more insulted at the blatant disregard for even basic continuity. The first film clearly established the characters lived in a world with early humans. And yet at some point they come across dinosaurs and apparently, the meteor hasn’t hit the earth yet? And there’s an asteroid going to hit the earth in this one? And why hasn’t that squirrel gotten that stupid acorn already?

Everything you’ve heard about this movie is pretty much right; it’s stupid, bland, annoying and worst of all, completely unnecessary. If it teaches us anything, it’s that no matter how dead the franchise, sequels will always find a way to beat it down harder. And you can probably expect to see Ice Age again on this same list, same blog in the next ten years under the entry Ice Age 15: The Squirrel Causes A Nuclear War Trying To Get His Acorn.

2. Nerdland

Have you ever wanted to see an 85-minute-long pilot for a bad adult swim show?

Of course you don’t. Nobody does. But it was made anyway.

Nerdland is just… ugh. Out of all the bad titles to come out this year, this is by far the most tedious and grating to sit through. It somewhat tells the story of two 30-year-old has-beens on their way to become famous in Hollywood and all the people they step on and abuse in order to get there.

The problems with this movie are exactly what you’d expect; it suffers from the awful syndrome that plagues most animated shows for an adult audience nowadays. Lots of sex, gross-out jokes, cutaways gags and doing it all under the guise of supposed satire. And the worst of its crimes come down to the waste of a talented voice cast including Paul Rudd, Mike Judge and Patton Oswalt.

The characters are all detestable morons which, by adult swim logic, means people will naturally want to put up with them for over an hour (spoiler alert: we don’t). The art style is hideous and the character designs are all crude and unappealing. Some of the backdrop work is nice but it barely has any focus. Motion is stilted and barely animated, looking similar to a slideshow with moving mouths half the time.

There’s really not much else to say about Nerdland; it’s simply an exercise of watching two awful people being awful with a ton of gross-out thrown in for shock-value. It’s stupid, pointless and becomes ultimately incredibly dull and forgettable.

1. Norm of the North

At some point, some studio executive actually viewed this movie and thought it was good enough for cinema. After all, who in their right mind would want to deprive their child of this never-ending circus of horrors known as Norm of the North?

It’s absolutely amazing how much nothing in this film works. Animation, story, voice-acting, writing, editing, literally everything about this film is wrong. The plot is idiotic and filled with plot-holes and blatant inconsistences that anyone over the age of three would be able to spot. So many plot elements are either never explained or cast to the wayside. For example, Norm, the polar bear, can talk to humans. This is never explained past the fact that he’s “special”. Norm also doesn’t hunt animals for food and yet there’s no explanation of how he’s still alive since there’s nothing else to eat in the damn artic. The so-called environmental message is so confused that half the time, it seems like Norm’s plan is to doom the artic rather than save it.

The animation is lazily rendered and can look fairly terrifying at some points because of the horrible character designs and unrendered cgi, throwing it straight into the uncanny valley and then kicking it for good measure.

Ladies and gentlemen, your nightmares for the next month, courtesy of Norm of the North.

The human characters all either look awkward and wooden or weirdly proportioned and almost of them look dead behind the eyes. We’re given cutesy animal sidekicks in the form of three lemmings, who spend a good minute of two of screen-time urinating into a fish tank. And I believe that sums up the film as a whole. Oh, and it also features Rob Schneider as Norm, therefore giving it no redeeming qualities.

It doesn’t even have the distinction of being so bad it’s good, it’s just an endless abyss of stupidity and horrifying animation. There is no redemption for this movie. Nothing about it went right. It is pure garbage. Do yourself a favour and find something better to do with your time. Give your toenails that clipping that they need. Read some of your old textbooks. Smack your head against a wall. Just do anything else instead of watching this movie.

And that concludes my top 5 worst animated films of the year. There’s been a fair amount of good and bad in the animation scene this year and with announcements in 2017 for such films as Cars 3 and The Nut Job 2, it looks like it’s gonna stay that way for a while. Happy new year everyone and here’s hoping it treats us well. Fingers and toes crossed.

#animatedfilms #worstof2016